Please Note: This is a very atypical post; but, one I thought would help many (especially men) who may get their feelings confused by images--especially, when it comes to "online" relationships. Many men (and some women) place way too much emphasis on how a person looks and get involved in a "romantic" online relationship for the wrong reasons. Emotions and "feelings" are often sparked by an image; which result in feelings based on "fantasy" and "illusion". People can even think that they are "in love" only to finally meet and be very disappointed or feel that they were "tricked". On the flip side, some men may dismiss a woman based on her online image, only to discover that they dismissed a very beautiful woman.
My recommendation to Women: If you decide to use the Internet to look for a potential spouse, post the most unflattering picture of yourself that you can find. If a man sees you at your worst and is still interested in pursuing you, it will be based on reality instead of fantasy and you will not be feeding into the "lust of his eyes" and/or guilty of confusing the poor guy and setting yourself up for heart break.
My recommendation to Men: Think about how you would react to the images below if they were posted on a women's online profile. Perhaps that will help you get a "reality" check and make you realize that you may place way too much emphasis on images. Always assume that a woman will post the most flattery picture of herself possible. Keep that in mind. She will not look like that picture when you meet her in person, or in the morning with no make-up on. The images below should clearly send that truth home.
I have read so many testimonies of disappointment, heart break, anger, etc., caused by this very thing. One woman in California fell in love with a man who lived in Florida. They had become engaged online and when she went to meet him for the first time; she was shocked to find that he was 50 pounds heavier and 15 years older than the image that she had been looking at for over a year online. Needless to say, she felt deceived.
We are all so prone to vanity and we all place way too much importance on outward beauty. I found this a fascinating study and I hope my observations and my recommendations will be used to give all of us a "reality check".
Which picture should she post? Same woman - You "fall in love" online with the one on the right and finally meet (in real life) the one on the left:
The real woman below. Definitely not a "glamour shot". What you see, is what you will get. No surprises and no disappointments. Wouldn't you rather know this ahead of time?Look below at the images on the right. Let's say you had only seen the image on the right and based your feelings on thinking that the image on the right was really how the woman looked. You couldn't wait to finally meet the "woman of your dreams" and when she arrived at the airport, you were greeted by the "real" woman; the one the left: